BY JESSICA LANDMON
Anyone who has sat through a Sunday School class or attended Vacation Bible School has probably, at one point or another, learned about the fruit of the Spirit. Personally, I can rattle them off in rapid form – love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. These are the qualities that the Holy Spirit develops in a believer’s life. They are an outward sign of an inner transformation at work in us.
Over the years, I’ve spent time reflecting on many of these like love, patience (ugh!), and self-control. They often take the spotlight as I reflect on the fruit of the Spirit. But one of the fruits that seems to sit quietly in the background is gentleness. It’s rarely the focus, but it’s deeply needed in our world, in our homes, and in our own hearts.
Let’s make one thing clear, gentleness, as perceived by many, isn’t weakness. It’s strength wrapped in humility and compassion. It’s a decision to pause before reacting, speak life, and show love when the world would react differently.
Here are five ways that we can exhibit Holy Spirit gentleness in our everyday lives:
1. Be gentle with a stranger.
That woman at the cash register, the flight attendant on your plane, the elderly woman in front of you in line at the grocery store that is slowing everyone down – you don’t know what she’s walking through. Maybe she’s holding back tears. Maybe she’s dealing with sickness or financial troubles. Maybe today is heavier than most. A smile, a kind word of encouragement, or even just a little patience can change the whole dynamics of her day. Be gentle.
2. Be gentle with your children.
Your voice becomes your children’s inner narrative as they grow up. The way you speak to them, especially in moments of frustration or disappointment, shapes how they’ll speak to themselves for years to come. Choose words that build them up and encourage them. Correct, but do it with love. Be gentle.
3. Be gentle with your spouse.
You made a vow, not to just love your spouse, but to protect and honor him. I realize that when you spend that much time with anyone, it is easy to get frustrated at the littlest things, but you have a choice on how you respond. Choose uplifting words when you communicate, and let your actions reflect Jesus. Instead of looking to be right, look to create an environment of peace. Be gentle.
4. Be gentle with people you disagree with.
In a world overflowing with disunity and division, it’s important to be a bridge, not a wall. Look for areas you agree on, and focus on those things. Gentleness doesn’t mean compromising truth, but rather being sensitive to the tone and words you use to communicate. You don’t always know where people are coming from or why they believe what they believe. Speak truth with humility, not superiority. Be gentle.
5. Be gentle with yourself.
When you look in the mirror and don’t like what you see, or when you fail to meet a goal you set, pause. Before you speak viciously to yourself, remember that God’s grace is not just for others, but it’s for you too. We are all a work in progress, and progress doesn’t always look like perfection. Be gentle.
Sweet friend, the fruit of the Spirit is not just a list of suggested character traits. It is evidence of a life fully submitted to the Holy Spirit. And gentleness is certainly no exception. So today, if you do nothing else, be gentle!
Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. – Philippians 4:5