BY JESSICA LANDMON
I was recently reading one of my favorite passages of scriptures, but this time it hit a little differently. The famous account of Jesus walking on water is something I am quite familiar with. Actually, I have preached on it many times. This time, however, I read it in the Passion Translation, and Jesus’s words cut right to my spirit.
At about four o’clock in the morning, Jesus came to them, walking on the waves! When the disciples saw him walking on top of the water, they were terrified and screamed, “A ghost!”
Then Jesus said, “Be brave and don’t be afraid. I am here!”
Peter shouted out, “Lord, if it’s really you, then have me join you on the water!”
“Come and join me,” Jesus replied.
So Peter stepped out onto the water and began to walk toward Jesus. But when he realized how high the waves were, he became frightened and started to sink. “Save me, Lord!” he cried out.
Jesus immediately stretched out his hand and lifted him up and said, “What little faith you have! Why would you let doubt win?”
– Matthew 14:25-31
“Why would you let doubt win?” Wow! I hadn’t thought about it that way. Jesus asks Peter such a personal and heartfelt question, basically asking him why he stopped the miracle in progress.
I began to reflect on moments in my life when, just like Peter, I too let doubt win. I can almost hear Jesus speaking to me. “Jessica, why did you let doubt win? We were doing it. We were walking on water. But you doubted me and began to sink. Of course, I rescued you. I will always be there. But my intention wasn’t a rescue mission. I wanted to walk on water with you!”
How many times did I abort the mission that Jesus intended for me and settle for safety and certainty when Jesus wanted to do something awesome with my life? How many times did I ask to be rescued from a victorious moment because the waves around me were so big that I got scared? How many times did I retreat to safety when I just needed to trust Jesus a little longer?
How many times did I let doubt win? How many times have you?